Ever the helix, ever the waterfall. It all depends upon how you look at it.

Following on from several recent posts, and the discussions they prompted with various people afterwards, my mind has been addressing the topic of the progression through life and how our circles change.

It brought me to an interesting conclusion, and a better understanding of why it is that so many people have such an issue with turning 30.

Now topics such as turning 40 are little more understandable, since it carries with it some concerns over mortality, chiefly that there may now be fewer years before you than behind. We'll tackle that one another day, but suffice it to say that I find it to be a poor way of looking at it, given the pleasures in life.

Turning 30 doesn't carry that particular issue, but it is one point in life where we tend to stop. Take a moment. Call out in the dark, and realise that far fewer voices call back.

In school and university you are often beset on all sides by other like minded souls, and our social lives can truly run. But as we pass out of those times and into work, its very easy, over the years that follow, to lose much of that capacity to hold hands in the dark, and our bonds begin to fail.

At 30 comes the first waypoint where we all tend to stop and take note of the voices that have become too distant. The voices that we can here have often changed as well. Like minded souls are moulded by work and family life that focuses their attention and creates drift. Everyone does it, and don't believe for a moment that you haven't either. We all have, but it is slow and hard to see until a moment causes us to stand in the dark and the wind to see how many voices, with how many candles, stand against the rain.

To many it can seem like an ever tightening helix, our social circles coming in on us ever tighter.

But there are other ways to look at it. Going back to my last post, I believe we are all in a cascading pattern that does eventually separate some of us based on the choices we make. But conversely, those choices can set you free. You can choose your myriad cascading paths with a wideness that allows you to move nearer to those voices, so that together you can hold hands, brace against the plunge of time and stay together.

It will come down to your choice as to how to treat it. To my mind, the waterfall is better. It is a chaotic shape that allows you to make your own decisions amongst the flow. And never forget that you have that power; to stand in the dark and hold on to the hands of those dear to you.

Don't assume they will come to you. Be true to yourself and grab a hand. Because when someone who cares about you grabs your hand, what can you do but grab back? Fight to take that plunge together.