Doors aren't two way, you always pass through them in one direction, but sometimes people follow.

So here we are, it's basically been a week at my new work now. And, to be honest, it's been bloody hard.

It's not the fact that there is more work to do in this job, and it's not to do with the delightful fact that I've apparently gone up a level without even realising it was about to happen.

More than anything, it made me remember how hard it is to start anew in any situation in our lives. For me, it's largely been frustration here about not knowing what I'm doing, and feeling like a numpty. Now, in my sane moments I know, and am frequently told, that I'm being too damn hard on myself; expecting to run before I can walk. And that is true, in any of these situations, those around you should adapt and accept the fact that there is going to be some time taken before you're kicking ass and taking names.

In the past 48 hours I've gone through the depths of feeling wretched about hte whole job thing, largely due to one bad day, and right back to realising that its the right thing to be doing and I'm just being too damn hard on myself. Awesomeness will come back to me, and there will be no charge (for there is no charge for awesomeness)

But it made me think about new starts in general. I know a number of people who've had new starts, not just in jobs but in their entire existence almost. I for one have had to, at least what feels like, restart my existence a couple of times, and whilst they're never that catastrophic in hindsight, they certainly feel that way at the time.

Lest I forget that this is far from being the worst time that I've had a new start. In 2006ish when I first moved up to Preston, I did it properly. A job lined up, a place to stay temporarily. But you forget how achingly lonely it can be in a first start like that. It was only the fact that I deliberately lined up martial arts classes up there that allowed me to stay sane with it all. Through those lessons I met a martial arts teacher, now sadly functionally deceased (or at least the version I knew... That's one for another day...), who did his damndest to get me to every bloody class possible and meet everyone there. And through that I've earned some awesome life long friends (Dave, Kirsten, Rich, Kat, Yates (Tiffany), James Davey, Craig, Jamie, Graham who broke my ribs, Eddie the soul of Iaido, Gary Knight on hand with filth on tap...).

But you can't see all that coming at the time that the new start comes, and it is difficult for everyone. I myself have been lucky to have the ever loving and awesome Jess supporting me as always, as well as kind words and a damn good hug from my mother (you're never too old - for a hug or a cuff round the ear...) as well as all my family and friends. They help me keep the logical side running with the ball when you're sat there not knowing what to do or how to act for ages.

It's all looking good here, and I'm confident things will go well with the job, but I wanted to share this with you and implore more than anything:

If you know someone who is going through a new start, whether it be a new job, moving out, divorce, marriage or simply picking a new and weird supermarket, be supportive to them. Because on the ridgeline running between lives, its always a little more lonely.

And for those of you doing it now, look out for the rest of us, because we'll be there for you. And the change is normally worth it.